As the end of the year draws near, it’s a time to enjoy the festive holidays and look toward the new year. But, before we get out those party hats and streamers to count down the clock on New Year’s Eve, we want to help you do a little bit of self-examination.
Let’s pretend that you have a year-end review with your boss, who, also happens to be yourself. What would you say about how you’ve done this past year?
For the Year 2016:
Do you have any regrets?
What are you most proud of?
Did you make any significant life changes?
Which goals did you accomplish?
Which goals did you forgo?
Did you make any new friends?
Did you lose any friends?
How well did you handle negative experiences, and feelings?
How are your relationships at work?
How are your relationships at home?
What experiences grew you the most this year?
Overall, how happy are you with the person that you were in 2016?
There are many more questions that we could add to this list, but we just wanted to give you an idea of where to begin. So, how is your review looking so far?
We know. It’s awkward to answer these questions about yourself. It’s bad enough that you may have to do a year-end review at work, and now we are asking you to do one here. There is an upside to the awkwardness, we promise! Learning to look honestly at yourself is the first step toward self-love and acceptance.
Now, make two lists from what you’ve learned during your review. One list is comprised of things about yourself that you are happy with. Write these in huge letters. Rainbow colors, even. Put them up on your bathroom mirror, or somewhere where you can gaze proudly at them while listening to “Born This Way.”
Next, make the list of things that you would like to change. Be kind with how you phrase these things. Instead of saying something like, “I need to stop being such a horrible procrastinator,” say something like, “I would like to work on time-management.” It’s okay to want to change things about yourself, but it’s not okay to be mean to yourself up in the meantime.
Finally, make a plan on how to change something that you don’t like about yourself. Let’s take this time-management example. Maybe you could break-up your tasks into smaller and more manageable elements, or, perhaps you could use a calendar to set various deadlines for yourself. The mechanics of how you approach the issue isn’t as important; what matters is that you are kind and gentle with yourself throughout.
Oh, and one more thing. Maybe, after realizing that you aren’t the best at time management, you also realize that this isn’t something that you really want to change. Guess what? That’s okay! Being aware of your flaws isn’t mutually exclusive with loving yourself the way that you are.
Surprised? Let’s talk more! Contact us, as sometimes a therapy experience can help with ones’ self-reflection. We are here to help!