Your child holds it together all day at school—then falls apart the minute they walk through the door. The smallest thing sets them off: the wrong snack, a sibling in their space, a routine change. You’re left wondering, What happened? and Why is this meltdown happening now?

This is often called the after-school meltdown, and it’s especially common in neurodivergent children, including those with ADHD, autism, or sensory processing differences. During the school day, your child works incredibly hard to follow directions, sit still, mask emotions, stay organized, and navigate social dynamics. That kind of effort is exhausting—even more so when
their nervous system is already more sensitive to stimulation, transitions, or pressure.

By the time they get home, your child’s internal “battery” is drained. Home feels safe, so their body finally lets go. The meltdown isn’t manipulation—it’s release. They’re not giving you a hard time; they’re having a hard time.

So what can you do?

✅ How to Help:

Create a soft landing.
Avoid jumping into questions, homework, or chores right away. Instead, offer quiet time,
a snack, or some sensory-friendly activities to help them decompress.
Keep your expectations low (at first).
Think of after-school time as an emotional cooldown period. It’s okay if your child needs
space, silence, or movement before they can connect.
Co-regulate before you correct.
Your calm presence can help your child’s nervous system settle. Sit nearby, offer a hug if
they want one, or just breathe together.
Be curious, not reactive.
Later, once things are calm, you can gently explore what felt hard. For example: “It
seemed like your day took a lot out of you. Want to tell me about it?”

Supporting after-school meltdowns isn’t about fixing them—it’s about understanding them. When your child feels safe to fall apart and be met with compassion instead of punishment, they build the resilience to cope more effectively next time.